


Smitten With Skeletons

by SalemLucidEster



Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: #depression, Amazon will be the death of them all, F/M, Grim says no..., I'll choose how I die dammit!, Low Hp, MC can fluster skeletons, MC won the lottery, Multi, Shit, What Have I Done, genocide route survivors, horror is a soft boi, i was supposed to make a plot, mentions of suicide???, nvm, she hates it, slice of life?, this is a tag, undertale fangirl meets the skeletons, uuuh
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-09-03
Updated: 2020-06-13
Packaged: 2020-10-06 04:03:59
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 10
Words: 10,880
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20500589
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/SalemLucidEster/pseuds/SalemLucidEster
Summary: There are skeletons. You are smitten with them.Sans - CC (Comedy Central)/David - LV 1Red - Ainz/Eren - LV 5Blue - Lupin/Arthur - LV 1Horror - Elias/Hunter - LV 13Reaper - Grim/Terry - LV 1(A/N) I do NOT own Undertale or the various AUs. Undertale is owned by Toby Fox. The AUs were created by other people. Please pardon my head-canons and the taking of artistic liberties.Rated 'C' for crack fiction… Rated 'M' for mature content... Enjoy the stupidity…





	1. Because Chapters Need Titles (Apparently)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Six Skeletons, One Maid](https://archiveofourown.org/works/7124200) by [RaccoonSinQueen](https://archiveofourown.org/users/RaccoonSinQueen/pseuds/RaccoonSinQueen). 
**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which no skeletons appear yet.

You have no idea what happened. One minute you are some bum living with your parents; unemployed, broke, and in the process of applying for disability. The next, you’re driving up to your new house; states away from your family. A house that’s more of a mansion, really. One that's hidden away from most people. One that now belongs solely to you and no one else. All your things are already inside, waiting to be unpacked. This is _your_ estate. You have no idea what happened.

No. That's a lie. You know exactly what happened. You just can’t believe it. After all, who actually wins the lottery from buying a ticket as a joke?! Let alone a lottery that set the record as the most money to be won to date? You’re in shock, honestly. With more money than you know what to do with, you paid off your car. You like your Chevy Sonic! You also had it fixed up, which doesn't even put a dent in your bank account. So you offer to help your parents pay off their debts. After much debate between the two, they decline. They won't let you help your brother, either. So then you try to help your friend. While they couldn’t stop you from sending them presents, they refuse anything more than that so you’re at a loss.

So what do you do with the rest of your money? You donate it! Not all of it, but you give most of it to charity and other such things. For a while, you’re relieved; you got rid of a fair amount. And then like some sort of horrible curse, you get MORE. Why?! Why would you get MORE money for giving a bunch away? What the actual FUCK, economy? Why do you do this to me?! The next step in operation ‘Kill Da Monies’ is to invest it. And god fucking dammit, it gets you more! You’re drowning in money. Thank god you aren’t advertising having so much or you’d be murdered.

So none of you plans worked. You have enough money to start your own tiny city. But you aren’t clever enough or social enough to even want to do such a thing. So instead, you buy a house. I mean, you have the money now. Why not move out on your own, finally, and start your life? It seems like the thing to do. You can’t stay with your parents anyway... For more than a few reasons. That’s another matter entirely. Nope. Now you have your own house. And you’re driving up to the wrap-around driveway.

You can’t help but look at everything. A six foot brick wall covered in ivy outlines the property, but wrought iron gates allow entry to the forest and the road to and from town. The garden is well taken care of and there’s a fountain, gazebo, and even a glass greenhouse. Of course, now that you own the place, it'll be up to you to hire someone to care for the lawn and garden. You'll have a few people come around twice a month to keep the place maintained. 

As for the actual mansion, it’s gorgeous. You still can’t believe it’s yours. It’s like some kind of fairytale. A three story mansion surrounded by forest. It’s made of cobblestone, or at least looks to be. Much like the walls surrounding the property, there’s ivy growing along some of its surface,though it’s maintained to be more decorative than destructive. The actual design is something of a mix between Victorian and a castle. Complete with balconies, stained glass windows, towers and turrets, and even a wrap-around veranda. A place that, should it fall into disrepair, can easily go from a fairytale mansion to a haunted one. And, frankly, you’re fine with either look.

That’s just the outside! Parking your car and getting out, you look up at _your_ new home. Keys in one hand and suitcase in the other, you unlock the door and step inside. Oh god. IT’S BIGGER ON THE INSIDE! Okay, not really. But it feels that way with no furniture. Fuck… Though it doesn’t take away from the pure elegance of the interior. A mix of wood and stone really makes the place feel organic yet sophisticated. The perfect mix of a rustic lodge and a European estate. You can feel a shiver run down your spine. It is perfect. And empty. _SO_ empty. Welp, you know what you'll be spending money on for the next month or two.

Which is exactly what you did. A month and a half later, your house is fully furnished and decorated. Your kitchen, bathrooms, and supply closets are also fully stocked. But most important of all, you have high speed WIFI throughout the whole place. Even the attic, which you use as a sort of private office/hidey hole. A home away from, or rather, in home. You even added a bathroom and kitchenette. It’s like it’s own apartment up there. But you also love the rest of your house. Your bedroom is the one closest to the attic stairs, too. Which makes being a lazy shit all the better. Everything is perfect.

Except it isn’t. You live in this huge ass mansion all by yourself. Which does wonders for your anxiety and depression. If it wasn’t for the maid who you hired to come in once a week, you probably would have starved to death by now. Forgetting to eat has always been a problem with you. That wasn’t the reason you were thin, though. No, that’s your crazy ass metabolism at work. Yay~ No, the lack of eating only makes it harder for you to do things. You know, hard things. Lifting heavy items, running marathons, climbing mountains, standing for more than ten minutes without passing out; those kinds of things. Though your notoriously horrible health mixed with said lack of food and depression definitely makes it worse. Yeah… Moving out was a mistake. But this is _your_ house now, dammit, and you are keeping it!

You were currently suffering from a dizzy spell and laying on the floor. Though you aren’t sure if it is due to low blood pressure or low blood sugar. Why not both? At least the floor has never betrayed you! It was always there for you. Catches you when you fall. Hangs out with you when you are lonely. It’s your best friend!

“I love you, floor. I've absolutely fallen for you. Laying with you always leaves me floored.”

And now you’re giggling. Yeah. You need food. The talking to inanimate objects is normal though. That’s nothing to worry about. Not at all. Crawling to the nearest food source, you grab a… Oh! A honey bun! Sweet! Scarfing that down, you finally stand up and look down at yourself. You should probably shower too. Self care isn't really your forte. At least you’re really good about everything else! All your chores are done and everything is clean! Everything but you.

“Yeah… I need a shower…”

Despite practically drowning in money, you still only use cheap name brand shampoo and soap. Not even winning the lottery could break you of your frugal ways. Old habits die hard and having been raised that way, you see no problem. You do have nice shampoo and soap and such, but you save those for bad days. And you would occasionally splurge on something you loved. But that’s reserved for hobbies; not things you can just go out and buy easily. It seems silly to do otherwise.

Stepping out of your bathroom, you get dressed in nothing but a tank top, panties, and a hoodie that is quite literally five sizes too big. Ah, the plus side of living alone~ You look around your room and smile. Your weeby ways are evident by the sheer amount of merchandise and fanart. If it isn’t anime or some sort of fandom, it’s books and crystals and candles. Aside from the ‘secret’ attic, this is the most personalized room in the whole house. The attic is much the same, to be honest, except there is more.

Stretching, you flop onto your memory foam, cool gel, queen-size mattress and sigh happily. This is your happy place. Yes, you’re lazy and you love it. It wasn’t like you _needed_ to do anything. If your parents knew they would throw a fit. Not that it's any different than when you lived with them. Just... less yelling.

You wiggle and move around, cracking your neck and back. Another blissful sigh escapes you. Which is soon followed by a loud crash of thunder. You hadn’t noticed, but a storm was raging outside. But then again, blackout curtains are good at blocking out the world. So when the thunder shakes the house, it’s only natural that you scream and jump.

“Shit! Did it actually hit the house?”

The lights flicker as if to answer you before going out. Narrowing your eyes and huffing, you sit up and find yourself in the eternal debate. Flashlight or candle? Now, when is a better time to use your old fashioned candle holder than now? But also, you need to get the power back on and make sure nothing is on fire. What a waste. Maybe if everything is okay and flipping the breaker doesn’t work, then you'll light candles. Seemed fair.

“Yosh… Handy dandy flashlight-chan it is. Away!”

Grabbing your flashlight and heading out, you check each room for anything. No fires or broken glass. WIN! Which is good because you never put on pants or shoes. Yep, still only in a tank top, hoodie, and panties. You're an adult! You do what you want! That and you’re too lazy to go back and put on actual clothes. It’s not like anyone would see you like this anyway. You live alone… Why does it feel like you just jinxed something?

Shaking your head, you head towards the entryway. Everywhere else was clear and this is the last room to check before trying the breaker. Just as you enter, you feel the hair on your skin rise and you smell ozone. That… can’t be good. A bright light and loud crack suddenly shake the house again. But the light stays. Saint Elmo’s fire? You duck down, cause that what you're supposed to do, right? No? Who cares! There’s some weird electricity thing in the middle of your entryway! Is this how you die? It’s actually kinda kick ass, but no! Not today Satan! You _just_ took a shower!


	2. Oh Look! A Chapter!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Skeleton, Finally!

You didn’t notice it the first time, but the second you did. And the three times after. The sound of something heavy clattering to the floor in the center of the room. There wasn’t anything in the room that could fall like that. Nor could those things go ‘oof’ and curse. The electric… _thing_ started to fizzle before going out completely; like it never existed. Hearing groans, you shine your flashlight on the heap in the middle of the room. People? How the fuck did they get in? And just like that, the lights turn back on. Well… No need to go to the breaker now…

But that left four… No, five strangers laying in the middle of your floor; groaning and grumbling in pain. Numbly, you turn off your flashlight. That was something you had control of. Getting a better look at the blob of people, you furrow your brow. They look familiar. Very familiar. Cosplay? Still unnoticed by the group, they start to argue with each other.

“get off!”  
“‘m tryin’ to ya fucker!”  
“LANGUAGE!”  
“ya mind getting off this old pile of bones buddy?”

You just stood there staring in blatant disbelief. Were you struck by Lighting? Did you maybe pass out in the shower again? Were you passed out on the floor? Did you die and this is like, some weird last dream? Because none of this can be real. After all, five skeletons are arguing as they untangle themselves from each other in the middle of your entryway. And not just any skeletons. They are all skeletons from a game, or at least, variations of said game. They’re all Sans, from Undertale. They were all still arguing when one of them spoke up.

“... there’s a human…”

That got them all to shut up real fast.

So, mental recap. There was a storm. Your power went out. Some weird shit happened; And now, five very fictional skeletons are jumbled together on your floor. You felt faint again. You have to be dead, or dreaming, or hallucinating or… _something_! Because your favorite character didn’t just appear into existence like this! This is madness… This is SPARTA! Okay… No… Stop the memes. See? Look what that got you? Now all the skeletons are up and ready to skewer you. Wait… They’re going to skewer you! You put up your hands in a surrender motion and back away.

“Uuuh… Don’t kill me please?”

“gimme one gud reason not ta!”

“Um… You’re on the surface and you can have my food?”

Well, that seems to at least shock most of them into not attacking you. That leaves two, it seems. Two are still wary and ready to attack. Your mind races with anything to save your hide.

“A-and… Okay, I’m gonna be honest, I’m trying to think of a joke or pun and I got nothing… Still kinda in shock about skeletons appearing out of nowhere and trying to kill me…”

Yeah. Smooth. Seems you used up all your puns for the day earlier. At least that seems to make them calm enough to not outright murder you. Now able to take a breath, you do a headcount. The line up is a little odd, fictional skeletons aside. Classic, Blue, Red, Horror, and Reaper. Normally in fanficitons, there would at least be a Papyrus mixed in here somewhere. You mentally scold yourself. Yes, because this is obviously a fanficiton. Well if it is; Hi readers. Nice to not really meet you. You shake your head. You need to focus. The downside of dissociation mixed with ADHD.

“So… Um… I promised food? Kitchen is this way… Please don’t stab me in the back. Literally, I’m trusting you to not stab me as I take you all to the kitchen…”

You just can’t shut up, can you? To be fair, this is kind of a weird situation. Impossible even. Kinda like winning the lottery… Oh my god, this is actually a fanfiction. Putting aside that probably false existential crisis, you lead the skelemob to the kitchen and just let them wander. Horror, bless his soul, seemed torn between killing you and ravaging your kitchen.

“Seriously, take whatever. Preferably not me… I want to live, thanks…”

Well, that’s all the invitation Horror needed before digging through your fridge and stuffing his face. Nothing fell through. So magic-infused food doesn’t seem to be a thing you need to worry about. Yay?

“what do you mean we’re on the surface?”

“Um… that… You’re… On... the surface? I’m not really sure how much clearer I can get…”

“wha’ i wanna know is, why am i here?”

“I WAS FIGHTING THE HUMAN. THEY… THEY KILLED EVERYONE… SO HOW-?”

Everyone, except Horror, looks at each other. You frown. Blue was from a genocide timeline? That is so sad!

“gonna be honest, me too… i was in the judgment hall and-”

“same… lil shit really did a number on me.”

“so i’m guessing we all were fighting a human in some manner? i… i’m pretty sure i died…”

The others nod. Except Reaper. But he seemed to be in a similar situation. At least, he wasn’t disagreeing with anything. Horror said nothing, just watching everyone warily as he stuffs his face. You just stand there. What else can you do?

“tha still dun answer my question!”

“I… I have no idea. I don’t know why you all just appeared in my house in the middle of a storm. It makes no sense… You make no sense.”

“you don’t seem too surprised or scared though. are monsters already freed here?”

You pause and try to think of what to say. Being honest would be easier.

“Monsters… They don’t exist here… There isn’t even a Mount Ebott…”

Everyone is frozen in shock, except Reaper.

“then how do you know about it?”

Well crap. This is going to be… A BONEafide shitstorm. Hahaha… ha… You’re gonna die…

“Okay… So… How many of you like games?”

No one seems pleased by this question. Not even Blue. Fuck.

“Well… You’re all _from_ one! Hahaha... “

Yeah… You’re gonna die...

“explain, human…”

“You are all a character from a rather popular video game. Or… At least _you_ are. Everyone else, you’re sort of like… A spin-off? Fanmade alterations of the original?”

You point to classic Sans and try not to forget to breath. All of their eye sockets are now completely void of light. 

“i don't believe you, kid…”

“You… Know about the AU theory right? I mean… Now you all have proof. Look at you. You're all the same person. Just different. From different timelines. So… Why can't there be a world where you only exist as fictional characters? Hell, I bet there's one where I'm fictional. So… so why is that so hard to believe?”

You shrink away from the hollow stares directed towards you. And then your back hits something. You yelp but manage to not scream as you look up at Horror, who is directly behind you.

“... i don't care… Pap died… i died… you have food… i'm hungry…” 

Knowing Horror's timeline, you can't blame him for getting to that conclusion. Giving him a nervous smile, you motion to the rest of the kitchen.

“Have whatever you want.”

Horror grunts and does just that. The other Sans’ seem to have huddled up and start to talk. You let them. You have more pressing matters. Like your spotty vision and sudden dizziness. You quickly sit on the floor and lean your back against the counters. You don’t feel good. You also are probably as pale as a corpse. You need food, but it's too far away. Yes, a whole five feet away. But you can't move. You're too weak and shaky. Oh well, a nap it is. You are asleep before you slump to the floor.


	3. Yup, it's a Chapter

You feel like you had slept forever yet not at all. Never a pleasant feeling. And to add to it, someone is yelling. Why is someone _yelling_? You groan and attempt to roll over, away from the noise. Only to find you can’t. You whine again and wiggle in an attempt to move. Something smooth yet hard presses tighter around you. This was now obviously not your bed. The yelling continues.

“HUMAN! PLEASE WAKE UP! THIS IS NO TIME TO TAKE A NAP! WE ARE IN QUITE A PRECARIOUS SITUATION AND NEED YOUR ASSISTANCE.”

You groan again and open your eyes. Did you fall asleep watching Undertale videos again? Looking up, you get a face full of skeleton and scream. The skeleton screams back and drops you. It would seem they were the one holding you just now. Wait…

“What?”

Seeming to regain himself, Blueberry puffs out his chest.

“AS I WAS SAYING HUMAN, WE ARE IN A RATHER… OTHER ME WOULD YOU STOP THAT?! IT IS DISTRACTING AND DISGUSTING!”

You look over your shoulder to see Horror still chowing down. He wasn’t eating as fast as before, but didn’t show any sign of stopping. With Swap’s attention on him, he just blinks once before shoving a whole orange into his mouth. Oh my god he has fangs! Do NOT stare! Don’t drool!

“MWEEEEH! YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO PEEL THOSE!”

You snort and cover your mouth. This draws both their attention to you and you gulp. Trying to make yourself smaller, you press yourself against the counter again.

“Um… Hi?”

“HUMAN. I AM STARTING TO QUESTION YOUR SANITY. BUT THAT IS OKAY! I AM HERE TO MAKE SENSE OF ALL THAT- OTHER ME! WOULD YOU STOP BEING A SLOB FOR FIVE MINUTES AND HELP ME WITH-”

“... they weren’t sleeping… they passed out…”

This statement causes you to blush and stare at the ground like it’s the most interesting thing ever. It also seems to shut Blue up. 

“HUMAN… IS THIS TRUE? DID YOU PASS OUT?”

You nod, not really able to lie at the moment. That would take more effort than you can muster. Blue gasps and grabs you again.

“ARE YOU UNWELL HUMAN?! WHY DIDN’T YOU SAY ANYTHING! WORRY NOT, FOR I, THE MAGNIFICENT SANS, WILL NURSE YOU BACK TO PERFECT HEALTH.”

“... i thought you were gonna question them…”

“WELL, YES… BUT THAT WAS BEFORE-”

Just then, the other skeletons mulled back into the room.

“i toldya the midget couldn’ do it…”

“we all agreed he was the least threatening and most likely to get the kid to talk…”

“‘nd that obviously didn’ work now did it?”

“i can take a swing at it…”

“we also agreed that torture would be the last resort.”

“who said anything about torture? i was simply gonna try sweet talking her-”

“ya couldn’ sweet talk a blind grandma. if we’re trying to-”

“we’re _not_… i believe what we’re _trying_ to accomplish here, is to get a general idea of where we are and what’s going on.”

“WHICH I WAS IN THE PROCESS OF DOING. BUT NOW YOU ALL RUINED IT!”

“... we could just… try asking her…”

You once again find all eyes on you. Er… Eye sockets… This is doing wonders for your anxiety. Blinking up at the five skeletons in your kitchen, you take a deep breath.

“I mean… I don’t mind answering your questions… I just… Really need food…”

That seemed to be Horror’s cue as he walks over and plops himself onto the floor next to you. He is awfully close, but you don’t care because he shoves one of your favorite breakfast bars in your face. You gingerly take it and thank him, despite it technically being yours. The irony of Horror giving you food was not lost on you. Nibbling on it, you look at the others. 

“Um… Feel free to sit down then?”

Classic and Red sit on the floor across from you. Reaper sits on the floor but lets himself flop to the side and lays down lazily. Blue seems to huff at all this, but unable to find a chair, sits himself on top of the counter.

“So… Um… Whatcha wanna know, then?”


	4. You Guessed It, A Chapter

You ask what they want to know. What you don’t expect is for Classic to pull out a clipboard and pen.

“Is… Is that a _list_?! How long was I out?!”

“a while… long enough for everyone to help make this. now-”

“How long is _a while_!?”

Classic shrugs, indifferent to your panic. All sockets are on you again as you slouch in defeat. Sans is about to start asking his questions before he is cut off again. This time by Horror. He’s looking down at you with an odd expression.

“what does your status mean by ‘you can’t take care of yourself’?”

You were now bright red and stunned.

“WHAT?! It doesn’t say that. No way. I can totally take care of myself! Right guys?! Tell me what it really says!”

You look at the others and they seem to be frozen in place.

“heh… um… to be honest, i haven’t ‘_check_’ed yet..”

“What?! Why the hell not? Are you telling me none of you checked my stats yet? And you’ve been here how long now?! What if I’m dangerous? Or… Or… I don’t know!”

You throw up your hands and regret it as your vision spins. Horror is suddenly pressed against you and you aren’t sure if it’s because he moved closer or if you fell. Looking back at the other Sans’, they all finally seem to be looking through you. And now they look nervous.

“i hate ta tell ya toots, but he’s right. that’s your status…”

“and you don’t have any EXP or LV… so you’re safe…”

“but your HP… it’s a little low, buddy... “

You blink. The grim faces directed at you are concerning.

“How low?”

“HUMAN, TRY NOT TO FREAK OUT... BUT YOUR HP IS ONLY FIVE.”

“O-oh… I always figured it would be eight or something. Heh, but look, one HP per skeleton!”

Bad joke is bad. No one laughed. You frown and sigh.

“Well, there’s no helping that. So can we move on… Still can’t believe my blurb says I can’t take care of myself… I totally can… ‘m an adult…”

“r-right… so i guess our first question is, are we really above ground?”

You nod and smile. Looking out the window, you are a little disappointed to see it still raining and completely cloudy out.

“You are, however, it’s raining, so you can’t see the sky. I can show you later once the clouds clear up, though. If that’s okay with you all, that is.”

Blue is the most openly excited about this and nods. The others are more guarded, but you know they want to see too.

“next question. you said you know us from a game. so i guess… how much do you know?”

Classic’s expression is cold. Enough to send a chill up your spine. Looking around, everyone has equally serious expressions.

“Well… I can’t exactly say for certain. For most of you, it’s rather in the air. Some of your timelines are rather different, but… um… I know you’re monsters from the underground. Trapped under Mount Ebott due to a barrier placed by seven mages. I know you need seven human souls to break the barrier and already have six. I know you have brothers named Papyrus, who is by far the coolest guy around. I know you are a sentry, looking out for humans…”

You trail off there to let all this information sink in. Before anyone can speak, you continue.

“I know about more personal things too. But… I don’t want to share them if you don’t feel comfortable.”

And there go the eyelights. You shiver again and look down.

“what kinda personal things we talkin’ about, human?”

“... That your HP is 1… That you’re the judge… About resets and timelines. About the lab and the machine and Gaster. About the blasters and shortcuts. Or, at least I know of them. I don’t have the full story by any means…”

You’re scared to look up. You know those are all things a Sans finds very personal. That keeping secrets was something they found important. So having a complete stranger know all this… It must be mortifying.

“I’m sorry… But… Do you all at least know the differences between your timelines? That might be something you should talk to each other about. It would help with a few things on my end later…”

The room is still silent before Classic speaks up.

“heh… wow… uh… you sure know a lot there, kiddo...”

“Sorry… Um… We can take a break if you want. I’m pretty sure simply having you all watch some TV will answer a LOT of your other questions… So…”

You slowly stand up and walk to the archway leading out of the kitchen. The others get up as well, all in various states of shock and caution. You lead the group to the living room and turn on the TV. You go to the national news channel and just leave it there for everyone to watch. You hurry over to your favorite couch corner and curl up. Once again, Horror sits next to you, causing you to look up at him. His arms are free of food now and his good eye is glued to the TV, much like everyone else. You take this chance to relax a little and lay your head on the arm of the couch. The news goes through the most current science and technology, world affairs, politics, nature and weather, and other pressing matters. What an easy out for you.

Once the news starts to repeat itself, you sit up and lower the volume of the TV.

“So… Does that answer most of your questions? I figure all that’s left are personal ones.”

The skeletons look back at you and nod. You give a reassuring smile and motion for them to ask away. Surprisingly, Fell is the first to speak up.

“This house… It’s expensive and huge. How do ya afford it? And who else lives here?”

You snort and cover your mouth. He would be the one to question where you get your money.

“I live here alone, though a maid comes in once a week to keep things from gathering dust and brings in the groceries. I also have a few gardeners come in twice a month to maintain the grounds. As for how I can afford this place…”

You give a creepy smile just to unnerve the group.

“I somehow won the lottery. I’m not even sure how it happened. I bought the ticket as a joke. But here I am with a whole mansion! I don’t even know what to do with my money anymore. I just spend it on junk. And I just keep getting more! Make it go away!”

You are in an obvious state of distress now, showing the skeletons you aren’t lying. Letting out a sigh, you flop back onto the arm of the couch. With a groan, you ask for the next question.


	5. The Chapters Are Multiplying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans - CC (Comedy Central)/David - LV 1  
Red - Ainz/Eren - LV 5  
Blue - Lupin/Arthur - LV 1  
Horror - Elias/Hunter - LV 13  
Reaper - Grim/Terry - LV 1

“so… you don’t have any kind of time machine or anything?”

“Nope… The most advanced piece of technology in this house is my cell phone. I wouldn’t use a time machine anyway. That’s just asking for trouble.”

“alrighty then… um…”

“WHAT IS YOUR NAME HUMAN?”

You raise a brow.

“Didn’t my stats tell you?”

“YES, BUT THAT DOESN’T EXCUSE BAD MANNERS OR THE NEED FOR PROPER INTRODUCTIONS! AS I’M SURE YOU ALREADY KNOW, I AM THE MAGNIFICENT SANS!”

You giggle and hold out your hand to shake his. Giving your own name, you look around the room.

“And so are the rest of you. This will get confusing fast. As much as I hate this, I’m gonna have to hand out nicknames if I have any hope of talking to you lot. Any objections?”

Blue seems ecstatic and bounces in his seat while the others just mostly shrug. You look up at Horror to gauge his reaction. In fanfictions, he’s always the one most against the nickname trope. But he seems fine so far.

“Hmm… Well, if you’re fine with me choosing…”

You point to Blue.

“Lupin! Your nickname is Lupin.”

Blue beams and looks close to jumping out of his seat to tackle you in a hug. You then point to Classic.

“CC, short for Comedy Central. It’s actually a TV station. I will regret telling you this.”

Classic smirks and quickly grabs the remote with his magic. You roll your eyes as he tries to find the channel. He finds it sooner than you hoped. Pointing to Red now, you smirk.

“Ainz. No, you don’t get to ask what it means or where I got it from.”

You turn to Reaper now and give an apologetic smile.

“Grim. Because of the fairy tales and because of the definition.”

Finally you look up at Horror. It finally occurs to you how huge he is. He was easily the largest skeleton in the room. Not that you mind. You smile and pat his arm.

“And Elias, because I like that name and the character it belongs to.”

You aren’t sure if you imagined his eye light twinkling, but you still smile up to him.

“So, is everyone okay with their names?”

“wha the hell kinda name is Ainz?!”

“A kick ass name that you are now forever going to be referred to by me, at the very least. So grow a pair and deal with it, Aniz!”

You aren’t sure when, but you are now standing and pointing at Red/Ainz with a huge grin. After a beat of silence, the other skeletons start to snicker and look away. Ainz however, was bright red and scowling.

“w-w-who do ya think ya are, ya bitch?! ya can’t talk ta me like that! you dun know shit!”

You blink and take a step back. You weren’t expecting Ainz to get so angry. You probably should have, but his anger scares you. You were never good with yelling, and the look he’s giving you is honestly terrifying. Ainz stands up and steps closer.

“who left you in charge, anyway? ya think you can just hand out names and we’d all be buddy buddy? like hell i’d let ya boss me around!”

You take another step back. You are confused. Ainz had agreed to a nickname. So why is he being so scary now? You start to shake a bit. No real memories flash before your eyes, but your collective feelings of fear from all the time you had heard yelling growing up definitely make you start to panic.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean it like that. I… I just…”

“ya just thought ya could take advantage of us, eh? could laugh at us?”

“No! That’s not what I-”

“damn right it ain’t! i won’t let ya just walk all over me like some-”

“that’s enough, dude. chill. you’re scaring her…”

“so what? she’s just some human! like the one who killed my bro! why should i-”

“BUT SHE ISN’T THE HUMAN WHO DID THAT.”

“she’s still a filthy human. they’re all the same!”

You shrink back and attempt to leave the living room. You try to not have a panic attack as the skeletons argue, which only makes your anxiety worse.

“while i agree most humans ain’t exactly the best, this one seems to be safe.”

“and she hasn’t even tried to attack us. i say that’s pretty _killer_ of her.”

Reaper/Grim gives a wink to the group as you continue to try to make your escape, but you once again bump into a broad skeletal chest. You look up at Horror/Elias in, well, horror.

“U-uh… I…”

Elias raises his hand and you flinch as he brings it down. But instead of hitting you like you had somewhat expected, he pets you. Blinking, you look up in surprise.

“What?”

“... i’ll protect the little angel…”

“Huh?”

You are confused now. What is Elias talking about? Ainz is shouting at the others and you flinch when he looks at you. You quickly look away only to find Elias once again petting your head.

“... angel’s house… angel’s rules…”

You blink in shock and look up. What is he talking about? Sure, this is your house, but you have no right to tell anyone what to do. You put up your hands in defense.

“N-no! It’s fine. He can be mad. I really don’t know anything… I may know some things, but nothing about you all personally. And you know nothing about me… So… I can’t exactly tell any of you what to do. I can’t even protect you so it’s not like you have to stay…”

You look down at the floor and sigh.

“Just...if you do leave, please be careful. Most humans are… at best easily scared. At worst, violent and cruel. And even if someone is a fan of the game you are based on…”

You shake your head and frown.

“Just be careful out there, okay? There are a lot of humans who would want you dead… or experimented on. And after what you saw on the TV, you should realize you're outnumbered. Even if all your fans band together with good people… I doubt…”

You are rambling now. Playing with the hem of your hoodie, you look up at the skeletons. They are somber and nervous.

“Sorry… it's just… Our government is really good at hiding things and getting what they want. So even if all the good people try to save you, there will still be others out to hurt you. And that's not even bringing other countries into account…”

God, you suck at this.

“You probably wouldn’t be given rights either…”

You need to shut up. Like… Now…

“Um… but! I’m sure if you keep hidden well enough you would be able to live freely out there. You would just have to be careful and…”

You finally fall silent and sigh. Looking around the room, you duck your head. This isn’t what they want. It isn’t what you want for them, either.

“You’re free to go or stay. I won’t report you or anything, so you don’t have to worry about that. I couldn’t do that to you guys. Even if I wanted to, no one would believe me. So, you’re free to do as you want. Um…”

You look around again as you try to smile. You build up your courage to say what you want to.

“If you do stay, there's guest bedrooms. You can just pick one and claim it as your own.”

Lupin seems to perk at this.

“WE CAN PICK OUR OWN ROOMS?!”

You don’t even get to answer before he races off to claim his. You snort a bit at how happy he seems and shake your head. Ainz glares at you a moment before sitting back down. He’s obviously pouting. All the other Sansi sit back down lazily as well. All except Elias, who is standing almost uncomfortably close behind you. How long was he standing like that?!

“Um… If… If you _do_ stay, I have a few rules I would ask you to follow. Or, at least, would recommend you take into consideration.”


	6. Oh My God a Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans - CC (Comedy Central)/David - LV 1  
Red - Ainz/Eren - LV 5  
Blue - Lupin/Arthur - LV 1  
Horror - Elias/Hunter - LV 13  
Reaper - Grim/Terry - LV 1

The skeletons look at you expectantly. So, they at least seem to be considering to stay. This excites you more than you care to admit.  
“I… would actually prefer if Lupin were here to hear them, too. I don’t really like repeating myself… I tend to forget things when I do that.”

Ainz groans at this as Grim gets up.

“i’ll go fetch the little hellion, then. be right back.”

Grim blips out of sight to fetch the energetic skeleton as you move over to the couch. There’s room for everyone to sit, but you still take the floor. Elias sits directly behind you and you start to feel a little worried. You can’t say for sure what kind of person Elias is, but the fact he’s so close makes you nervous. Is he being creepy on purpose? Is he thinking of eating you? Killing you?! You try not to panic.

Which backfires when Grim and Lupin blip back into the living room. Right in front of you. You actually scream and jolt back against Elias’ legs. And then you scream and jump again when said skeleton grabs you under your arms and lifts you up. You must look like a terrified rabbit or something because he sits you in his lap and starts to pet your head. You squeak and blush as the other skeletons stare or laugh. Mostly laugh.

“I’M SORRY HUMAN! I DIDN’T MEAN TO SCARE YOU!”

“-out of her skin…”

And the skeletons, minus Lupin, are chuckling again. Lupin screeches at the pun and glares at everyone before sitting next to Elias and looking at you. CC/Classic was the one to make the pun. At least he seems to be relaxing a bit now.

“so, what’re your ‘rules’ kid?”

“Ah. Right. Um… Pretty self explanatory, I think. Don’t fight in the house. Don’t kill people. If you see a human, hide. If you have to interact with a human, try not to be seen. If a door is locked, stay out. Though that will usually just be my bedroom or when I’m in the bathroom. Tell me if you guys need anything; I’ll get it for you. And if you go out somewhere, try to tell me first?”

“that’s a shit ton a rules there, human…”

“Oh… Um… Also, and this is just to save your sanity... Never EVER look yourself up on the internet… Just… Don’t… Please. Save yourself.”

“okie, _now_ ya got me curious, kid.”

“Trust me… There are some things that should never be seen. There just isn’t enough bleach in the world...”

“IS IT REALLY THAT BAD HUMAN?”

“Yes! It is! Don’t do it, Lupin! You don’t have to stay pure, you just have to not see _that_.”

Lupin looks at you and blinks. As if something you said doesn’t make sense. You blush as you try to figure out how to explain this.

“I mean… You’re an adult. You can do whatever you want. But some of the things they have on there about you guys is just… Horrible and gross. No one should have to see those kinds of things about themselves.”

Lupin is staring at you now, rather intently, but nods. His eyelights seem to have grown even bigger. CC just sort of winces at what you said and shakes his head. Ainz looks utterly curious and seems to be itching to pull out his phone. Grim simply raises a brow at the whole situation. He was sitting noticeably farther away from the others. As for Elias, you have no idea what his reaction to this all is because you’re still trapped on his lap being pet like a kitten. Though, that seems like a good enough thing for now.

“Speaking of adults, you all have needs, I assume. You deal with them however you need to. That being said, this is NOT a dungeon. This is my _house_. So don’t abduct people and keep them here against their will. And if you do bring someone here… I don’t know… Just… Try to keep out of trouble? I don’t need the police knocking at my door, asking why there are sex-crazed skeletons living here… Ya know? I can’t protect you if you basically out yourselves to the public like that…”

You sigh rub at your temples.

“And I don’t know if heats are a thing or not, but-”

“haha! _r-right_! we get it, kiddo, ya… ya don’t gotta give us _that_ talk. haha- wow… um…”

You blink and look up at the skeletons, realizing they are all now blushing brightly. You smirk.

“_What_? It’s natural right? I’m just trying to hit on all the bases now. Do what ya gotta, guys. Just don’t think I’m obligated to help you all with that.”

“OH MY GOD, _HUMAN_!”

“jeez kid, you’re _killing_ us here.”

“Sorry, not sorry~ Though, that brings up my final concern. If soulmates are a thing, and you find yours, I honestly fully expect you to go after them. Unless they are happily married or something, I see no reason for you to not pursue your soulmate and find happiness. If you all have the same one, somehow, I expect you to at least be civil enough to let the person choose who they want. But it’s not exactly my place. Just remember to follow human laws and to not get caught by the authorities. That’s about all I got for rules and concerns, really.”

Everyone is looking at you strangely now. You blink and blush.

“What? Did I say something weird?”

“no… just… you’re rather-”

“shit kid, you’re-”

“open minded…”

“yeah, that…”

“AND KIND!”

“... an angel…”


	7. Retpahc A

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans - CC (Comedy Central)/David - LV 1  
Red - Ainz/Eren - LV 5  
Blue - Lupin/Arthur - LV 1  
Horror - Elias/Hunter - LV 13  
Reaper - Grim/Terry - LV 1

And you're blushing more now.

"I'm not. I just want to cover all the bases, like I said. None of you chose to be here, and I didn't choose to have you here. It's only fair you have freedom. But again, that is kinda my house and you need to follow the laws. No fighting, no killing, doors are locked for a reason, and hide from humans unless necessary. Only four rules. See? Not so many."

You give a weak smile and shrug. All the skeletons are still staring at you, making you uncomfortable.

"So, um… Welcome, make yourself at home. You have free reign of the house, pick a room, do whatever you want. I won't ask you to clean, but try not to make a mess in the common areas."

They were still fucking staring. You cough and stand up.

"Welp… I… I'm gonna go do my own thing while you acclimate. Have fun."

You pet Elias's shoulder and hurry off. To the attic. And promptly start to hide your undertale merch. Mostly the more… risque items. You smuggle them into your room and do the same there. There were now SO many skeletons in your closet. Both figuratively and literally. God you had problems.

With those items, that totally don't exist now, hidden away, _forever_, you start to rearrange your room a bit. You were particular about these things, so having empty spaces like this threw you off. OCD was a bitch like that. It took a while, but your room was soon to your liking again.

You go back to the attic only to find ALL the skeletons there. Well, you made it just in time.

"yur a fucken nerd. i shoulda known…"

"LANGUAGE! AND THAT WAS VERY RUDE, AINZ! I THINK THIS ROOM IS COOL!"

"that ain't my name ya fu-"

It would seem all the other Sansi were now glaring at Ainz.

"y-ya fruit loop…"

You tried not to giggle or smirk. It would seem cursing directly at Lupin was a no-no. How cute.

"Yes, I'm a weeb. I have no shame about it."

This seemed to make Ainz shut up a bit. CC was looking around intently and pointed at one of the undertale prints on your wall.

"so you're a fan then."

"I thought it was obvious? I mean, I know about the game and about you. Only a fan really would, right?"

"the human got you there, CC."

You just shrug and start to reorganize the room a bit. You paid the skeletons no real mind as they looked at everything. You did smile every time Lupin made an excited noise every time he found something he liked.

“THIS IS JUST LIKE DR. UNDYNE’S HOUSE! ONLY WITH LESS SCIENCE!”

You laugh and look over.

“I’m not too good at science… Or much of anything honestly. But thank you Lupin. I’m glad you like it."

"HUMAN! I'M SURE YOU ARE GREAT AT MANY THINGS. DO NOT BE SO HARD ON YOURSELF."

You laugh.

"Well, I am good at _one_ thing."

"SEE!? WHAT IS IT?"

You smirk.

"Sleeping."

Now that got the reaction you were expecting, causing you to laugh.

"HUMAN NO! YOU MUST NOT SUCCUMB TO SUCH… SUCH LAZY TENDENCIES!"

Lupin's eyes were, well, suddenly there and bulging out. It was actually hilarious. They really looked like googly eyes! CC smiled.

"now that's a skill i can appreciate."

You smile back.

"Oh! Did everyone find a room for themselves? And if you want certain furniture, I can get it for you. Actually, I'll probably get you all computers anyway…"

You wondered if that would arouse suspicion. How would you even get started setting things up for these guys? Would someone notice you buying more food, clothes and other things that would indicate more people living with you? Would the government think you’re harboring illegal immigrants or something equally illegal? You really didn’t want some government goon snooping around. It would seem you looked as stressed about the idea as you felt. That, and you totally ignored everyone’s answers.

“-angel?”

You look up when you finally realize that everyone was looking at you. Elias looked about ready to pick you up and pet you or something. Lupin just looked plain worried and the other three were staring at you like you might randomly combust.

“S-sorry, what? I got a bit distracted.”

“is _that_ what that was? ya looked like ya were gonna faint again.”

“Oh jeez-”

You cover your face and sigh. Of course you did.

“Sorry… I’m just tired. But I need to buy some stuff. You picked rooms right?”

The others nod and Lupin seemed to want to brag about his choice but refrained. You go over to your computer and boot it up. You were rather embarrassed to have a picture of a bitty bones sans as your computer background.


	8. BOOM! Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans - CC (Comedy Central)/David - LV 1  
Red - Ainz/Eren - LV 5  
Blue - Lupin/Arthur - LV 1  
Horror - Elias/Hunter - LV 13  
Reaper - Grim/Terry - LV 1

“da heck is _that_?!”

Ainz was leaning over your shoulder and looking at the computer screen. You blush and cover your face after noticing the others trying to get a look as well. 

“A… Sort of AU where there are monsters that are tiny and kept as companions or pets. Though, I think they’re more like tiny room mates. There are versions of all of you as bitties and more. Um! Bitties being the name of the small monsters…”

You trail off and blush brighter as you mentally scold yourself. Ainz looked at you in disgust and you didn’t even want to see how the others were looking at you. So you didn’t turn around to see. One skeleton 

“S-sorry… That’s unimportant at the moment though. I’m going to order you all laptops for now and more food. Maybe some clothes for you all as well? Any requests?”

Hearing the word ‘food’ Elias shuffled closer, sort of shoving Ainz away. You smile at him and quickly go to that online grocery shopping website. They deliver too! You start getting what you normally get before looking at Elias.

“Can you help me pick out more food?”

You tilt the screen so he can see better before Lupin rushes over as well. He leans over your shoulder and bounces on his heels.

“ALLOW THE MAGNIFICENT SA- er- LUPIN TO MAKE YOU MY FAMOUS TACOS!”

You pale a little at the thought and look to Lupin nervously. You were visibly anxious as you tried to think of something to stop him.

“Uuuh- M-maybe later? I’m not sure I have all the ingredients to make tacos.”

Or the patience to make sure the little ball of sunshine doesn’t melt your kitchen. Or make you die from food poisoning.

"But can I leave it to both of you to pick out groceries?"

You stand up from your chair and move out of the way, allowing the two skeletons to nod and move closer to the computer. You smile as they look through everything. At the very least, the two seemed to get along when it came to food. You pull out your phone and start ordering cheap chromebooks for everyone. Then they can at least get to buying their own things. Though you make sure to get a larger one for Elias. You would happily help everyone set them up too. Maybe make the font Comic Sans MS just to mess with them.

You giggle a little at the thought before thinking 'to hell with it' and making sure each chromebook is individualized to their respective skele. The giggle catches the other skeletons' attention.

"what's so funny?"

You hide your phone from view before sitting on the floor and sticking out your tongue.

"It's a _surprise_~"

You get all the bells and whistles, for their new 'toys'. Everything color coded and themed. You had a hard time with Elias', but finally found an industrial case that would protect the thing and didn't look like crap. You were beaming as you paid and put your phone in your pocket.

And then realizing what was going to happen from now on, you snort and giggle.

"I'm the sugar mama to a pack of skeletons!"

This causes a few reactions, ranging from snorts, chokes, and in Lupin’s case, a look of confusion.

“SUGAR MOTHER?”  
“i dun need yur damn handouts!”

Now you were giggling again and made a pouty face.

“Oh? And how are you going to survive here then?”

“i can take care o’ myself!”

“With what money, bone boy?”

Ainz freezes up and blushes, causing you to smile.

“Well? I’m up for suggestions, bone daddy? Any ideas on how to support yourself in a world you shouldn’t exist?”

Ainz only blushes brighter and your smile turns sly.

“You look good in red, your face should wear it more often~”

You were just teasing him now. He doesn’t even answer before pulling up his hood and blipping out of the room. You fall back into laughter and hug your stomach. That was amazing, You had to do that more often.

“NO BUT REALLY. WHAT IS A SUGAR MOTHER?”


	9. Such Chapter, Much Words, Many Writing

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Guess who totally forgot I had this typed up?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans - CC (Comedy Central)/David - LV 1  
Red - Ainz/Eren - LV 5  
Blue - Lupin/Arthur - LV 1  
Horror - Elias/Hunter - LV 13  
Reaper - Grim/Terry - LV 1

You had somehow managed to inform Lupin what a sugar mama was. Along with a few other things. All without having to resort to showing him porn! You feel like you deserved a medal for that. Especially considering the group of skeletons glaring at you the whole time and trying to stop you. And yet, they were also listening. Don’t think you didn’t notice! You noticed! And you are now housing a group of very sexually repressed skeletons. What could go wrong?

A lot. But you didn’t have to deal with that yet, so you wouldn’t! Ignore it until it goes away! Your life motto. It will probably get you killed, but at least you can feign ignorance until then!

You turn your attention back to grocery shopping and smile slightly at the sheer amount Elias ordered. And yet it was still less than you were expecting. Leaning your face next to his shoulder, you frown.

“You can get more you know-?”

Elias jolts and practically falls from his seat before looking up at you. A red and sharp bone was floating behind you, ready to impale your chest. Not that you noticed it. You couldn’t see it from your position. So when the other skeletons in the room all jumped to their feet with magic at the ready, you only looked at them in confusion.

“What? I’m not going to hurt him or anything.”

You turn your attention back to Elias and give an apologetic smile while crouching down. You offer him your hand. Elias was watching you the whole time with a bloated eye light. It wasn’t until you were crouched before him that the bone vanished. The other skeletons hardly relax though as he lunges forward.

“EEK!”

Elias now had you wrapped up in a tight bear hug and pulled you onto his lap. He hid his face in the crook of your neck and was making a weird whimpering noise. You frown and rub his back. Did you trigger something? Oh, poor Elias.

“I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to startle you Elias. There there…”

You hear grumbling behind you, causing you to look back at Lupin, CC, and Grim. They looked uneasy and a bit on edge.

“What? No one’s hurt, right?”

“not yet…”  
“yur gonna be the death of me kid.”  
“I AM MORE WORRIED FOR YOU MY LADY! IT WOULD BE WISE NOT TO SURPRISE SKELETONS! OUR MAGIC CAN BE QUITE… EFFECTIVE WEAPONS.”

“Magic?”

You look to Elias and frown. He whines a little more and holds you tighter.

“Did I startle you that badly? It’s okay. I should know better. I’m okay though, so no harm to foul. Right?”

You carefully pet the top of Elias’ head and hear his whimpering calm down. He sure was a clingy boy. You wondered if he even realized he was cuddling a human.

“There there Elli. You silly bean.”

Lupin makes his way closer and seems to be staring at you both. Without thinking, you reach out and pet his head too. He blushes slightly and lets out a ‘Mweh!’ which causes you to giggle.

“I-INDEED. NO ONE WAS HURT, ELIAS. AND WORRY NOT. I, THE GREAT LUPIN, WILL NOT ALLOW ANY HARM TO BEFALL MY LADY!”

“Your lady?” You smirk playfully as Lupin blushes a little.

“D-DO YOU NOT LIKE THAT NICKNAME?”

“No, it’s nice.Thank you Lupin. Now how about we all make sure everyone has everything they need for now and get ready for bed. It was a long day, no?”

You then look to CC and Grim with a smile.

“Though I have a feeling some of you won’t be sleeping so much as snooping tonight.”

CC flinches, realizing he was caught.

“It’s okay. Again, as long as you don’t go in my room, you can look wherever you want. But I don’t want skeletons going through my sock drawer. That’s where I keep all my super special secrets after all.”

You wink and laugh as the skeletons blush. After a moment of convincing, Elias finally releases you so you can stand and stretch. A few joints pop and you make your way out of the attic. You didn’t notice everyone tense and blush more at your actions. You had some guest rooms to supply with extra blankets. And maybe put some night lights in the halls. The skeletons may be able to see in the dark, but you couldn’t. And you really wanted to avoid getting scared out of your skin from walking into a skeleton in the middle of the night.


	10. A Two Digit Chapter

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sans - CC (Comedy Central)/David - LV 1  
Red - Ainz/Eren - LV 5  
Blue - Lupin/Arthur - LV 1  
Horror - Elias/Hunter - LV 13  
Reaper - Grim/Terry - LV 1

You woke up. Maybe. You weren’t actually sure. Your dreams were weird like that. You could be awake but not. So as such, you figured you could just go back to sleep. It wasn’t like you had anything to do anyway. You never did. You should probably get a hobby. Making plushies, Drawing? Maybe writing self indulgent fanfics that you just stop updating after a few chapters because fuck commitment. And let’s be honest, staying motivated is NOT your strong suit. Or any suit. Hm. Yes. A hobby…. But that was a problem for future you.

Yes. future you could handle it. You knew she wouldn’t but you were too far back to sleep to care. You were just about to lose consciousness completely when someone started pounding on the door.

“MY LADY! I AM SURE YOU ARE TIRED, AS IT IS WELL PAST NOON. BUT THERE IS A TRUCK APPROACHING THE HOUSE! WITH HUMANS IN IT! WHAT SHOULD WE DO?!”

You groan loudly and roll over before sitting up. You promptly throw on a shirt and shorts before practically throwing yourself off your bed and to the door. You manage to open it and find Lupin about to knock on your door again. He froze once the door opened and looked at you with wide eyelights. It was around then that the blood rushed from your head and your vision went black. You swayed and tipped forward, only for Lupin to catch you.

“M-MY LADY?!”

“-m fine…. Just… Gimme a sec-”

You took a few deep breaths and waited for your vision to come back to you. Once it did, you tried to stand, but Lupin wouldn’t have it.

“I’m fine now. You can let me go.”

“ARE YOU SURE MY LADY?! YOU ALMOST FELL JUST NOW!”

“I’m fine. It just happens sometimes. Now what was that about a truck?”

Lupin didn’t look convinced, but let you go. Sort of. His gloved hands hovered a few inches away from you. You sigh but say nothing else as you hurry down the hallway and to the stairs.

“What kinda truck was it?”

“Huh? OH! IT IS A DARK BLUE! IT HAS THE WORD ‘PRIME’ ON IT. DO YOU KNOW WHO IT IS?”

At this information, you smile and quicken your pace. Lupin lets out a little gasp and hurries after you. Though you weren’t sure if it was from excitement or worry. You didn’t look back to check. You were too busy flinging yourself haphazardly down the stairs.

“They’re here! Wait here Lupi-! I have presents for everyone! Don’t let the humans see you!”

You almost slam into the door right as the delivery men knock. You open the door with a big smile. After a quick interaction of only the barest of civil pleasantries, the men helped bring in five boxes and left. You were simply clapping to yourself in excitement and sort of a little dance.

“Prime is so worth it! Guys! GUYS! Present tiiiime!”

Lupin hurries back to your side and looks you over in worry before looking to the boxes.

“ARE THOSE FOR US?”

You smile and nod as you notice a few more skeletons walk in. Those being CC and Elias. CC looks between you and the boxes in suspicion before him, a permanent smile widens.

“presents? what’s the occasion, kid?”

“Your existence. Now get your boney butts over here so I can pass these out. Everyone has a different one.”

You promptly sit on the floor and look through the boxes that held the chromebooks and accessories. Lupin was bouncing in excitement in front of you before gasping.

“LET ME GO GET THE OTHERS!” 

And he was off. Elias came over and plopped down on the floor next to you with a loud thud. Something you were grateful for because you couldn’t open the boxes for the life of you without a knife or scissors. A knife would only freak everyone out and the scissors were back upstairs. CC was watching you carefully with his arms crossed, but he was clearly curious. You look up at Elias and smile.

“Care to lend me a hand Eli?”

Elias blinked slowly before nodding slowly and reaching out to grab a box. You, being the kind of person you were, instead gently grabbed his hand. Elias froze a moment and stared at you with a wide eye. You didn’t notice though as you took his index finger… Claw… And used it to start opening the boxes.

“Stars, I wish I had claws like these. I love claws and fangs. Useful AND sexy.”

You probably shouldn’t have said that last part out loud, but too late now. The two freeze and look at each other with wide eyes. Elias smirks a little causing CC to roll his eye lights. You shrug the thought away and continue opening everything. All the boxes were open when you noticed everyone was finally gathered and watching you. You smiled at them before setting things up.

“I figured you all would want your own instead of sharing. And now you can get your own stuff instead of needing to ask me to get it for you all the time. And some access to the outside world won’t kill anyone. Just don’t share pictures of video chat with anyone. You can voice chat though.”

As you spoke, you focused on setting everything up. Giving each chromebook a case and mouse. A red one for Ainz. Blue for CC. Lightblue for Lupin, black for Grim, and a large grey one for Elias. That one had one of those heavy duty cases so it could take more of a beating. You then hand them out to their respective skeleton with a smile. Grim seemed hesitant, but grabbed it quickly while avoiding your hands. You hummed at that before looking at everyone. 

“Now, they all need to charge, but that gives me a chance to give you all the wifi password, my address, and bank account info.”

You now took the chance to properly look at everyone. Lupin was practically vibrating in excitement, muttering something about being able to be an undernet star. Grim somehow got a hold of the box his chromebook came in and was reading the instruction manual. Ainz was looking at his, as if it would bite him or burst into flame at any second.

Turning to look at Elias, you blink. He was holding his chromebook under his arm and looking at his hand. The one you had used to open the boxes. Frowning, you walk up to him and grab his hand again. His bloated eyelight shifts to look at you.

“Sorry for using your claws like that. I should have asked. If you need help setting up your computer, let me know okay?”

Elias stares at you a long moment before linking his fingers with yours and nodding. You smile up at him and squeeze his hand back.

“That goes for the rest of you too. If you need help, just ask.”

Still holding Eli’s hand, you go into the kitchen and grab a pack of sticky notes and a sharpie. You quickly write down all the information you promised, password and such, and stick them to everyone’s chromebooks. It was then that CC came over, rubbing the back of his neck nervously.

“hey, uh, kid? thanks for all this. ya didn’t have to-”

“No, I didn’t. But I figure I have the money and you deserve as much freedom as I can offer. You all can buy things you want and need now. Be it clothes, things for your room, or whatever. You’re adults and I don’t want to control or monitor your lives. You’re people. And as such you deserve privacy and respect. Just, as I said, don’t share pictures, video chat, or give my private information to anyone. Or else we won’t be able to keep you all safe.”

CC blinks and just stares at you a long moment. You raise a brow and he blushes before looking away.

“th-thanks-”

“No problem CC. Now, you might want to look up something called memes when you get that thing up and running.”

You smile and nudge him with your elbow before going back over to Elias and helping him set up his new computer.


End file.
